Suspiciously Good

L has been good. Too good. I’m getting lulled into a sense of peace and harmony – that I am a normal mom and can just take my kid anywhere and have a normal-to-good time. This is a trap. It must be. There is no way a person can change so dramatically so quickly, right? Then again, he’s only 3. Is he sophisticated and cunning enough to pull off a farce like this? To behave so well that we let our guards down? Is it the Santa effect?

OK, I’m mostly kidding. I don’t really think that L has an elaborate scheme. I’m mostly sure that he’s not devising a plan, waiting for me to lower my guard and raise my expectations, just to crush and destroy me with a doubly evil outburst during some inopportune outing. I’m really mostly sure that’s not what’s happening. So what is it?

“L, it’s time to get ready for bed.” “OK, Mommy!” WHAT?
“L, let’s get shoes on, it’s time to go.” “OK, Mommy!” HUH??
“May I please have bezzert?” [sic] “Not tonight, you had a cookie earlier.” “Ok, Mommy.” WHAT HAVE YOU DONE WITH MY REAL SON?

I feel myself relaxing. I sense that my expectations are rising, despite my best efforts to keep them at rock bottom. If this is due to Santa’s list and the nearness of the reward for being good, then I’ve got to figure out some way to have an old, kid-loving man spy on L all year round. Parents everywhere would thank me! If not Santa, could it be that L is, gulp, outgrowing his desire to constantly be at odds with me? Dare I even think it? I just jinxed myself, didn’t I?

Whatever it is, I’m soaking it up. L is bursting with pleases and thank yous and agreements and general good will. I should record it. I’m sure you’d appreciate me whipping out my camera to show you a video of my good boy next time he’s shooting and chasing your child in the playground or knocking down a display rack in your store.

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